By Pratibha Castle -
As a girl I learnt to wish myself
invisible on the front seat
atop a double decker bus
believed I was a black hole choking
on gossipy fug Players smoke lonely
women’s sighs the clippie perceiving
no-one where I sat lumbering back
along the aisle past the ‘no spitting on buses’ sign
In a spin of schools quick to switch
as a card sharp's chicanery or
my mother’s mood taunts zephyr soft
could never break me for I wasn't there
I applied myself to investigating emptiness
convinced I was the pause in music
between thoughts air
in the hollow bones of birds
a missive spun from clouds
by a swift more luminous than pity
understood by those alone with senses
more than five
Having banished myself dismantled
tooth hair child’s spaniel yelp
grown flimsier than my granny’s ghost
I established how to melt through walls
Day by day my photo on the mantle faded
bleached features growing fainter
like an often-laundered stain
dissolving to a blur
Years on in Regent’s Park there was a man
with eyes that saw I tried to wish myself
anew re-embody muscle flesh
plumping over sternum hips
All I managed was a hand flaccid
as a starling fallen from the clouds
and that man casting not a clout passed on by
left me string-less kite adrift
Be Careful What You Wish first appeared in Ink Sweat and Tears, Day Two of ‘Choice’ for NPD October 8 2021
Pratibha Castle’s award-winning debut pamphlet A Triptych of Birds and A Few Loose Feathers (Hedgehog Poetry Press) was published February 2022. Her work appears in Agenda, HU, Blue Nib, OHC, London Grip, Fragmented Voices amongst others. Highly commended, long-listed and given special mention in competitions including The Bridport Poetry Prize, Welsh Poetry Competition, Gloucestershire Poetry Society Competition, Brian Dempsey Memorial Competition, Sentinel Literary Journal Competition, Storytown Poetry Competition, Pratibha is anthologised, and a regular reader for West Wilts Radio Poetry Place.
A selection of poems and discussion on her life and inspiration can be heard at Home Stage Meet the Poet.